As I write this my first ever money mastery live event is taking place in 4 days….and I have a sore throat, hacking cough and seriously croaky voice.
It’s interesting because my throat does seem to be a weak spot in my body. If I get a cold, it generally results in a cough that lasts for days (if not weeks) afterwards. (As you can imagine, coughing fits are not ideal when using hypnotherapy or tapping with a client).
So, I’m sure my body is trying to tell me something right now. It seems too much of a coincidence for me to develop a cough right before an event where I’m going to be speaking about a subject I’m truly passionate about.
My experience of working with clients is that there’s generally an underlying emotional reason for any physical symptom.
That’s why I took some time to journal on it this morning. I wanted to uncover the meaning behind my sore throat and release any blocked emotion.
I wrote about the constriction I felt, the irritation, the discomfort and the fear of coughing and spluttering at a crucial time.
And as the words came, I thought back to a conversation I had with my coach a couple of weeks ago. We were talking about how I could be more visible in my business and as we were speaking she commented on the clarity of my words.
This stopped me short, as I realised I had always thought of myself as someone who didn’t express herself very clearly. I often feel clumsy with my words.
So in the past I’ve held back from expressing myself as there’s been a nagging voice in my head saying, ‘Nicola, who would want to listen to you? You don’t have the right words. You just don’t make sense!’
And here I was receiving feedback that my words had clarity.
It prompted me to remember a conversation a few days beforehand when someone else had complimented me on communicating so clearly. (I had promptly dismissed the compliment as nonsense of course).
It’s interesting how we do this eh? We often deflect positive feedback and embrace the negative.
As I journalled this morning, I realised that the constriction in my throat was coming from that part of me that feels I should stay small, be quiet, be safe.
That small part of me feels so uncomfortable about hosting a live event that it has manifested a sore throat and hacking cough.
It all made sense. I could see the connection and although my sore throat hasn’t magically disappeared (yet), I felt a sense of relief.
Then I did some rounds of tapping to release the emotional blockage.
‘Even though I have this constriction in my throat and I can’t get my words out, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.’
‘Even though I have this irritating cough, this fear in my throat, and it’s keeping me small, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.’
‘Even though I have this fear and doubt in my throat and I’m scared I can’t find the right words, I choose to release that fear now. I recognise that I express myself clearly, with words that are compelling and attractive, and I deeply and completely love and accept myself.’
I will keep tapping over the next few days and I’m sure my throat will clear.
Writing these words and sharing them with you is a form of healing as well. (Even though I still don’t feel I’m expressing myself as clearly as I would like to – that pesky inner critic!)
I’m sharing this with you in case you have a fear that your words are sometimes clumsy, or you hold back from expressing yourself because you worry about how you might be received.
I want you to know, I get it.
I want to hear you.
I want to hear ALL of you.
And I invite you to join me in a declaration of intent: I choose to express myself freely and fully.
Say it out loud, often.
Now, where are those cough sweets? I am SO ready to rock it out on Saturday!
